July 11th, 2003

Just found this poem while scratching through my old files. Im trying to remember when i wrote it. The date on the file is 09/05/2003, but im pretty sure it was written before then. I really should start dating them when i write them. hrmmmm.
Dont get any weird ideas that im freaking out or anything after you read this. That was a long time ago… im fine now thanks to Melanie. But yeah… go ahead, read it…

I hate what she did to me.
making me think too much,
and double take every thought.
Finding it hard to trust again,
and love again.

Part of me longs for it,
the soft touch – the caring hugs.
Yet part of me is scared,
not wanting to get hurt again,
finding it hard to trust.

I know ive got to do it,
take the plunge and jump right in.
Yet there is also a part that is warning.
The part that oogles my stomach,
and aches the back of my head.

I guess i just have to believe,
follow my brusied heart and find it again.
That thing that makes you warm inside,
those feelings of love and happiness.
They have to be out there for me.

hrmmm 8:40am… sitting and doing nothing, gotta wait till 9sih to drop these plagiarism forms up to the woman. Just got some more emails from melanie! woohoo! she seems to only get accessat the conference between 8-8:30am each morning. Oh well, she will be back tomorrow!

Its really quiet at the unia t the moment, not much going on which can be expected since its damn early.

I couldnt sleep last night, so i cleaned up my lounge room and kitchen. I got rid off all the crap that was sitting around in piles everywhere. Im still not sure about the lounge room, id like to move it around but i dunno how, theres not many options… Kitchedn also got a cleaning. Wiped eveeything down with the disinfectant stuff. Its better then it was.

I think ill wash the cars this arvo, after grabbing some stuff from the shops. Dunno what ill do tonight, probably jsut stuff around till i get sleepy… *shrugs*

Righto, il off to do some work, yup work, gotta start putting this studyguide stuff together, the sooner i get it started the sooner it gets done